Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Emma Tales: Chapter V

Emma Pillsbury: Lovely Lass

Chapter IV
Canada is NOT in Scotland

The Plaid Challenge

It's International Day at McKinley! All the faculty members have been assigned countries and the students have signed up to participate. Why on Earth would you want to spend time on schoolwork in your free time? Extra credit and a day off from classes to eat eclairs, sopapillas and crème brulee, that's why! Anyhoo, adorable Emma has been assigned Scotland and she has done her due research on all things kilt-ish. So, she gives the kids their assignments--decorations, food, dancing, costumes, music and sports--and looks forward to the big event.

The kids totally bring it: delicious nibbles, great entertainment and a Braveheart presentation… Freedom! Hold the phone. Stop. Be kind, rewind…Sweet, clueless, Brittany bounces by in what would be the PERFECT outfit, if it weren't for...

"But, isn't Canada in Scotland? Mike Myers is Scottish and he's from Canada. He always wears Canada hockey shirts, and remember when he ate haggises and his dad wore a plaid skirt at his wedding. And then, his dad sang “Do you think I’m sexy?" because Rod Stewart is Scottish, too. That’s what my cat said”

"That was a movie. But, that’s an easy mistake to make. In real life, Scotland and Canada are separate places," Emma says. Oy. Emma squeezes her eyes shut and blinks them open, squeezes and blinks, squeezes and blinks. Rubs them with her fists and and even clicks her perfect Mary Janes, "there's no place like home, there's no place like home"...she's not dreaming! Fer real? Think about it. If it were a dream, Brittany would know on which continent she lives. The End.

No comments:

Post a Comment